The Kitchen Is On Fire

It's episode sixty nine and the boys are making the most of this most puerile of numbers. They discuss a nudist pop-up restaurant, caramel on your balls, and having sex with mermaids. James recites a gross recipe and says 'delicious' a lot. Sam reads the weekly mail-out from a Chichester restaurant. What would you lie amongst, nude? Do you want Chicken Tonight? And what day is your Dolmio Day? 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP69-_IT_IS_EPISODE_SIXTY_NINE.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 11:06am EDT

Things kick off with a ripping discussion on whether or not Mark Rylance could have played E.T. or Jaws. Conversation moves on to pondering weird food habits of the rich and famous, sexism, and potatoes. There's a cavolo nero update. Sam has developed a seafood allergy. James wants to be buried at sea after being fired from a human cannon. Margot wants to eat crab in prison. Can you eat a stickleback? How long does a fly's lifetime feel? How do you shoot a cow? Find out this week.

Direct download: TKIOF-EP68-_MARGOT_HASHTAG_YOLO.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:37am EDT

Following a raucous family Easter the boys reconvene at Pidgin to catch up. They discuss disliking food that, as a 'foodie', one is supposed to like, as well as James Martin's final Saturday Kitchen appearance and violent Easter egg hunts. James doesn't believe the government. Sam embarrassed himself in Starbucks. Is Seth Rogen a good dude? Can chickens get wooden breasts? And how lowball is too lowball? 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP67-LOW_BALL_FAILURE.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 5:08am EDT

Sam returns from a jaunt Stateside having eaten the hottest food on the planet and a pretty good dinner at Blanca. He and James discuss eating boiled eggs on a first date, doggie bags, and civet coffee. Sam gives a culinary crime update while James refuses to be lectured to by Judd Apatow. Was King Herod a bad dude or a matchmaker? Can you ride a giraffe? And what happens when you throw a python into a sushi restaurant? Find out all this and more on The Kitchen Is On Fire. 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP66-HASHTAG_SCRIPTURE.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 8:19am EDT

Sam's all excited about his trip to New York where he plans to eat a gargantuan amount of food. James, meanwhile, has gone part-time vegetarian and isn't drinking. Sam is disappointed. They discuss eating meat, smoked hummus, and whether Angela Hartnett and Josh Hartnett would make good new presenters of Saturday Kitchen. We have a cavolo nero update from Sam and Margot joins to talk about her new shoes. Is Sam on a downward spiral? Is James converting to Buddhism? And just how much is too much time spent on a Japanese toilet? 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP65-A_DAY_IN_MARGOTS_SHOES.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 5:51am EDT

The boys are back in town and have over-eaten again. Vibes are mellow. James has just had a massive ox cheek pudding. Sam ate some tuna and concedes that tuna is a bit gross. They talk about the office for a bit, James's brief editorship of a vegan magazine. and a charity dinner at the Globe featuring Simon Rimmer and Robbie Savage. Is it sad when classic restaurants close? Can Anthony Bourdain cook? And what drugs would you deal?

Direct download: TKIOF-EP64-JAMES_WEB.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 12:44pm EDT

Everyone in London has turned to dust in some sort of weird apocalypse, leaving only a few survivors. Due to his preternatural cavolo nero consumption, Sam is one of those survivors. He cruises around London wearing a bikini, looking for pulled pork. Angela Hartnett is stalking him. In a parallel universe, James waxes lyrical about chicken broth, ox heart, and befriending thieves. Who will keep the world running? What's up with Eddie Izzard? And just why doesn't Sam want to hang out with Angela Hartnett? 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP63-ANGELAS_APOCALYPSE.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 12:00am EDT

There's tension in the air as Valentine's Day approaches and the boys wonder whether or not there will be actual sex acts in the restaurant. On table four. James has hurt his wrist and their neighbour Sam the osteopath ("a stunning man") drops by for some impromptu hand rubbing. Sam from the podcast hates Mull Historical Society and ponders whether or not Jim from the Corrs is a holocaust denier. Is 'H Is For Hawk' a sexual read? Which animal would be more fun to be, a condor or a bear? And was Steven Avery responsible for Senator Marco Rubio breaking a tooth? 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP62-THE_MANITOWOC_TWIX_DEFENCE.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 12:56pm EDT

James arrives at the studio/restaurant wearing a marvellous pair of trousers and the boys set to. They discuss Sigourney Weaver's eating habits, calorific kale salads in McDonalds, Buzzfeed lists, and the general shortcomings of the food media. James wonders whether if you ate an egg whole you could subsequently lay it. Sam has to go to the restaurant to meet a superfan. How many hardboiled eggs can you eat? Has Jason Statham's diet changed? And have James's new trousers made him funnier? Find out in this week's The Kitchen Is On Fire. 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP61-THE_WRONG_TROUSERS.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 10:37am EDT

With Valentine's Day on the horizon, the boys get all romantic and ponder the things they truly, truly love. Sam, it turns out, loves cavolo nero. Loves it. James loves to cook lamb stew. Sam's been in the wars after being attacked by a colander. James talks about backgammon and haggis (again). Which beans do you love? Who loves crap bacon? And is dying in a restaurant the most memorable and romantic thing you can do on Valentine's Day? 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP60-CABBAGE_FOR_MY_VALENTINE.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 4:41am EDT