The Kitchen Is On Fire

A by-now legendary after-service recording occurs on Sam's birthday, with a debut appearance from 'sweet' Caitlin McDonald and yet another bizarre and shouty cameo from restaurant manager Jamie. They discuss honest criticism, arsehole volcanoes and whether people find James and Sam sexy. Sam has spent the day with sore testicles. James makes the strangest noise Sam has ever heard. What is a nugget? Why is Jamie shouting at Caitlin? What is a fish witch? Find out this week on the Kitchen Is On Fire.

Direct download: TKIOF-EP87-SWEET_CAITLIN_MCDONALD.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 6:56am EST

Sam and James' tails are up since their restaurant, Pidgin, was awarded a Michelin star. They agree it's time to knuckle down before moving onto in-depth discussions about yogurt on toast, Bristol restaurants, Spanish breakfast buffets, and Dutch food. Sam heroically brings about the return of the 'Obscene Ingredient' segment. James humiliates himself. Are navy outfits camp? Is Latin still a legitimate dinner-time language? And just what is the pecking order for eggs at a buffet? 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP86-EQUAL_OPPORTUNITY_EGG_COOKERY.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 4:33am EST

Sam and James are hanging out in James's office, much to his creepy delight. They chew over a debate they went to last week on French food, as well as pondering classic Italian restaurants featuring Kenny Rogers and quizzes in Paris. James bought a grouse. Sam is near-tumescent at his cavolo nero-heavy dinner at Pidgin. Why is James uneasy? What does kicking up the leaves mean? And can you milk Moby? 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP85-_MOBY_MILKING.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 5:52am EST

Direct download: TKIOF-EP84-JAMES20AND20SAM27S20BEDTIME20ROUTINE.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:24am EST

After a summer hiatus our heroes return to give Pidgin restaurant manager Margot a send-off before she heads to South America. The funereal vibe doesn't last, and over a few drinks they cover organ donation, the colour of blood, arseless chaps and Mother Teresa. Sam eats a sausage. James doesn't think he could kill Sam. Margot is a Norse goddess. Is it racist to confuse Tina Turner and Whitney Houston? Will Margot miss them? How long is an era? Find out this week....

Direct download: TKIOF-EP83-_MARGOTS_FUNERAL_PARTY.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 3:38am EST

Sam and James continue to mine the very depths of human inquiry with their restless and curious minds, pondering hare krishna here, discussing Lady and the Tramp there. We have groundbreaking discussions about soylent, the difference between maceration and marination, and the fellatio cafe due to open in London. Sam was shouted at in a supermarket carpark. James says 'virgin' rather too much. What is the Pidgin motto?What did Italian police do to a lonely old couple? And was everybody, actually, kung fu fighting?

Direct download: TKIOF-EP82-_THE_HUMAN_SNOWFLAKE.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:03am EST

After a brief hiatus the boys are back - to the future! And my word, the things they have seen. Nanobots taking over the planet, murderous toasters, people who can eat entire pint glasses, and cockroach milk. They also ponder the world's first 3D restaurant, the event horizon, and the resurrection of laptops. In many ways it's their most coherent effort yet, though they still find time to discuss food - egg sandwiches, cornichons, merguez sausages and Jeremy Beadle's diet are all scrutinised. Don't eat it all at once. 

Direct download: TKIOF-EP81-TOMORROWS_WORLD.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 4:00am EST

In which the silliest of billies discuss a bbq at John Torode's house, whether or not 'mummy' is a PC term, a witch's cottage and black coloured food.

Direct download: TKIOF-EP80-LURING20A20MULE.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:56am EST

We begin with an apology to a listener for offending her with the boys' gross toasty mouths. They soon divert attention by accusing Louis Armstrong of dishonesty and Guy Fieri of grotesque bigotry. Sam went to Reykjavik with his mum. James nearly killed Kit Harrington. Do we have all the time in the world? Where do genitals go when you hug? And just how atrocious an actor is Ben Affleck? Find out all this and more in this week's TKIOF.

Direct download: TKIOF-EP79-RESPECT_THE_BATFLECK.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 4:23am EST

The people of Britain have spoken and the results are clear: Pidgin hasn't made it into the Restaurant Awards top 100. Sam is angry but pragmatic. James makes some toast. They discuss drinking champagne on the rocks, Gordon Ramsay's new app (again), and that timeless Tom Selleck film 'Runaway'. James talks about his graffiti shame. Sam thinks he has ADHD. Would they make good politicians? What happens when you chuck Dairylea at the ceiling? Can robots make bisque? Find out this week.

Direct download: TKIOF-EP78-UNIVERSAL_INDICATOR.mp3
Category:Food -- posted at: 3:07am EST